Çetin Ay: “Childhood is lived only once, but parenthood is remembered for a lifetime.”

In the complexities of the modern age, the challenges of raising children are increasing day by day. International businessman and social policy expert Çetin Ay evaluated the pressure and dangers that the new generation of parenting approaches creates for children in our newspaper.

— Mr. Ay, what are your thoughts on the recent transformation of the concept of parenting?

Times have changed. But children are silently paying the heaviest price for this change. Many parents set out with good intentions, but raising children in the modern age is now like sailing on a rudderless sea. The new generation of parenting approaches has begun to see children as "little adults." We expect them to think like adults, make decisions, and take responsibility for their lives.

— What are the dangers of this approach?

There is a great truth that is overlooked: Childhood is not a stop to be skipped. It is the foundation of personality and the compass of the future. Giving children unlimited freedom is not showing love; on the contrary, it means pushing them into uncertainty. American expert Leonard Sax clearly explains this misconception in his book "The Collapse of Parenthood."

— Why do families fall into this trap? Because of the misconception of unlimited freedom being confused with love. Children grow up with guidance, not freedom. They need a guide, not a friend. Parents confuse friendship with guidance. Of course, it's necessary to offer children choices, but giving them more than they can handle at their age creates a burden on their souls.

— In this case, what role do boundaries play?

Boundaries are not a prison. On the contrary, they are a safe haven. Children grow up in the safe environment provided by boundaries, not in limitlessness. Indeed, I always say:

“Parents who don't set boundaries leave their children with uncertainty, not freedom.”

— How do you assess the impact of the digital age on children?

Today's children are trying to cope with the limitlessness of the digital world. It's only a matter of time before they lose their way amidst smartphones, social media, and a constant bombardment of information. Parenting in this age is more difficult than ever, but it's also a critical responsibility.

— Finally, what advice would you give to parents?

If you want to do your child a great favor, give them back their childhood rights. Don't be afraid to say "no." Don't be afraid to set boundaries. They might be angry today, but tomorrow they will be grateful to you for growing up within those boundaries.

Childhood is lived only once.

Parenthood, however, is remembered for a lifetime.

—Thank you, Mr. Çetin Ay.

You're welcome. I hope that awareness will be created in society regarding this important issue.